Guide in Backpacking Southeast Asia

Southeast Asia is always hot and humid. The mainland countries (Myanmar, Laos, Cambodia, Thailand and Vietnam) tend to share similar weather patterns, enjoying a ‘cool’ season from roughly December to February (peak months for tourism) and a ‘hot’ season from March to May. The monsoons last from June to October, bringing sudden torrential downpours for an hour or two every day, which are followed just as suddenly by sunshine. In Cambodia and Laos, travel can be disrupted by flooded roads during the monsoon season, but otherwise the rains bring a predictable relief from the heat.

Along the Malay peninsula, two monsoons strike: from November to February, the east coast gets all the action; from May to October, the west coast gets soaked. Alternating between the coasts will relieve the drawbacks of inclement weather. The duration of monsoon season varies from year to year.

Indonesia also gets two monsoons; the best time to visit is from May to September. The rains start in September in Sumatra and head east, arriving in East Timor around November or December. April to June is the best time to visit East Timor.

The wet and dry seasons vary within the Philippines but, by and large, January and February are dry months. Typhoons can hit both the Philippines and Vietnam between June and October.

Large festivals are also factors in plotting an arrival date. Businesses tend to close during Muslim Ramadan and Chinese New Year, and everyone goes water-gun crazy during the Thai, Lao and Cambodian New Year in April.

COSTS & MONEY
Western currencies enjoy a favourable exchange rate with many of the Southeast Asian currencies. If you travel and eat like a local, your daily budget might be a positively emaciated US$20 to US$30 a day. Even if you are strapped for cash, remember to keep prices in perspective. Compared to the average worker in Southeast Asia, your pathetic bank account is the equivalent of a robber baron’s. Many of the locals have never left their hometowns, much less travelled to a foreign country. Granted, the ‘walking ATM’ (everyone wants a withdrawal) treatment is frustrating and offensive, but there is no quicker route to a bad time than to get paranoid about being ripped off. Be a smart shopper, but realise that even in developing countries US$1 doesn’t buy everything.

LIFE ON THE ROAD
Southeast Asia is loud, no doubt about it. The roosters have been crowing all night, the screaming motorcycles have been doing circles around your bed and the guttural call to prayers seems to emanate from next door. It isn’t even noon yet and the temperature has already reached boiling point. You climb off the rock-hard mattress and head down to the shared toilet at the end of the hall. The mirror is too short, the sink is too low and the whole room needs to be sprayed down with bleach. Now it’s time for a shower (cold water for this penny-pincher), a powdering (keeps you cool and sweet smelling) and a desperate search for clean clothes.

Today is the day you pack up and move to the next town. Arriving at the destination station, the bus is flanked by touts all thirsty for your business. You haggle the price, which is always inflated due to an informal ‘I’m new in town’ tax. The first guesthouse you visit has a shady yard with chickens scratching around in the dirt but the room is dank and noisy, so you thank the testy desk clerk and set off down the road. You use your budget senses to sniff out the best score in town, and in a few hours you’re camped out in the shade with a steamy bowl of noodles and a sweaty bottle of beer. Beats the wage-slave life.

The empty seat beside you is soon filled by a curious local who wants to practice his English. He asks you all the usual Southeast Asia interrogation questions: where do you come from? How old are you? Are you married? With those formalities out of the way, this stranger and you are now the dearest of friends, according to local conventions, and you might pose for a picture with him before either parting ways or joining him for a night of karaoke. Yes, Southeast Asia is loud – but it’s friendly.

CONDUCT
You have an extraordinary responsibility upon arriving in Southeast Asia: you’re an ambassador for your own country, as well as for the whole Western world. You can either charm the flip-flops off the locals, which is easy to do in these laid-back cultures, or you can leave behind a sour taste.

So few travellers make an effort to speak the local language or adhere to social customs that the smallest attempts are usually rewarded with genuine appreciation and kindness. Learn how to say ‘thank you’, ‘hello’ and ‘delicious’ in every country you visit. Remember to smile – it expresses tons of emotions.

Dress modestly, covering yourself from the shoulders to the knees; this is the number-one way to communicate genuine gratitude to your host country. But it’s so hot, you might whine. What’s funny about this argument is that walking in the shade is a better sun deflector than showing your belly. Women who dare to wear more will help promote a healthier image of all Western women abroad; topless sunbathing is also a no-no. For men, resist the inexplicable urge to strut around without a shirt.

 In Southeast Asia, the feet are the cesspool of the body and the head is the temple. Treat the rules of proper foot etiquette like an exotic dance without a partner. Feet for the most part should stay on the ground, not on chairs, tables or bags. Showing someone the bottom of your foot expresses the same insult as flipping them your middle finger. Remove your shoes when entering a home. Don’t point your feet towards sacred images or people, and follow the locals’ lead in sitting in a temple or mosque.

Women aren’t allowed to come into contact with monks; this means women can’t sit or stand next to them on the bus, pass anything directly to them or touch their belongings. Most mosques have rules about where women can be and how they should be dressed.